Finding you !!!!!!

Here is an extract from the book “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azakaban”. It describes the scene were Dumbledore is explaining to young Harry why he particularly saw his father, who is dead, in the troubled times!!!


"You think the dead we loved ever truly leave us? You think that we
don't recall them more clearly than ever-in times of great trouble? Your
father is alive in you, Harry, and shows himself most plainly when you
have need of him. How else could you produce that particular Patronus?
Prongs rode again last night."
You know, Harry, in a way, you did see your father
last night.... You found him inside yourself."




The essence of the paragraph has always made me read the last part of the book more often. To be able to read and understand the message, I have always ended up reading the climax first and only then does the rest of the book follow!!!!

I can never really explain why I love these lines. The reason being, every time I read them, I think I have finally understood them most clearly, but it never turns out that way. I always end up finding a new meaning. Each time the new found meaning as good as the last one.


The words, each and every one of them is so true!!

It’s really funny that, such a thought should be written in a children’s book!

Let me end this post with another quote. Again on the same lines, but stating the obvious more clearly!!!!



Where are you searching for me, friend? Look! Here am I right within you. Not in temple, nor in mosque, Not in Kaaba, nor Kailas, But here right within you am I. – Kabir

Laterzzzz...

Guess the snaps couldnt get uploaded. Maybe they love my comp soo much that they dont want to leave!!!! Lolzzz........

Will surely do it later. And i am sure i will have to coax them real hard to leave their warm and comfy world of my comp and face the big bad world!!!!

Laterzzzz............

Flower Power!!!!!

During this summer break from my daily routine I was actually made to serve my younger bro, as he had his exams and was suppose to study really hard and not waste time. So every time he wanted anything I was made to literally “fetch” for him. Fair enough, coz during my exam times not only my bro but also the entire house is at my service!!!!!

[I really have doubts about him studying very hard coz whenever I entered his room I had caught him listening to music or playing computer games!!!!!…Well almost very time………ok…not exactly every time…but what the hell!!! I might as well exaggerate!!!!..Hehehehe]

This directly implied that all the chores that were done by him were suppose to be done by me, in addition to my daily chores. Still, fair enough. But what I was not aware was that he everyday used to go first thing in the morning to get flowers from within our compound for the pooja at around 8 am [irrespective of if he has college or not] for my granddad!!!!!!!

And I hate even stepping out of the threshold of the house without having a bath…coz it just makes me feel lazy!!!!!!

So this deal was totally ghate ka sauda for me!!!!!

After 1 day of throwing attitude and making my bro get it, I was fired and asked to do it…and that to at 8am…God!!!!!!!!!

So…next day I did have to go down to get flowers………..I simply enjoyed the experience!!!!!!!!!! For a job that ideally would take about 5-10min, it took me an hour and that too came home coz I was called!!!!!!! Sheesh……………..

I have always loved flowers. Their colors, geometry, the birds and the insects which are attracted because of them, their fragrance, the sticky fluid that is secreted if they are picked…all these things and many more have always fascinated me!!!!!

Unfortunately, for many years down the lane, I never had taken any special notice of the garden, which is right in my building compound!!!! And the worst part is that, I can’t think of any valid reason as to why I simply chose to ignore their presence!!!!!!! Its surprising that we chose to ignore things which are right in front of your eyes and yet they are all right in front of you. Waiting to get acknowledged.

This incident suddenly made of aware of the presence of these flowers.

I remember, as a child, I had always loved to water this garden [It was very intricately maintained earlier]. I always ended up royally dirtying myself with muck and water and returning home for a shower after 3 hrs of pure fun!!!!!! I used to sometimes even want o water the garden in the monsoons because it gave me a very good reason to have fun!!!!

But all this was years ago!!!! I have grown up! [Well……. hopefully!!!! Lolzzz] The garden is almost neglected…well almost!!!!

There are many new residents, which I was not aware of in the garden, and many old ones also. I was totally amazed!!! I simply cannot jot down how glad I felt for coming back to them all. It was truly an experience to be remembered!!!!!!!!

For 1 whole month this had become an “event” in my daily schedule, which I had then started looking forward to. I made sure that I brought up a huge pile of flowers which if distributed…. could be supplied to half of my locality!!! Lolzz…

With my college starting, I have not gone down to get more flowers…however I now make it a point to simply go and check on them, whenever I can. With the onset of monsoon in Mumbai, I am hoping to see even more colors and fragrances. Also hoping to see birds of all colours, shapes and sizes !!!!!!!

I had gone simply crazy trying to arrange and sort the flowers!!!! Here are some of the pics!!!!!

Hibernating mode is activated

Exams done.

Vivas over.

Thesis jury done.

Health royally messed up.

Messed up rooms.

Even more messed up cupboards and storage spaces.

Cell miraculously does ring anymore.

No phone calls.

No wake up alarms.

Late nights only for watchin TV.

NO CAD .

No blocks.

No scales.

NO WD, const, AD.

No cribbing.

No human figures.

No hunting for xeroxes.

Strange emptiness surroundin me.

I dont quite like it.

I actually hate it.

Long time no say........

Thank god !!! I could finally open this site and make a post. Actually, had been soooo busy with work and college tht i hd almost for weeks forgotten tht i maintained a blog. And as soon as i remembered, this site choose to ignore me !!!! LoL.......wht goes out comes back to u !!!!

College life has finally started takin a heavy toll on us and has left me sleepless and worried for almost a month now. The only thing tht has kept me goin through all of this is the thought of workin for thesis in May and enjoying myself in the meanwhile.

Actually, there was been sooo many gr8 things happening lately tht i seriously cant complain abt anything. But too many of good stuff has made me forget many of those incidents. Guess will hv to wait for the exams and the pressure to reduce to relly remember them and enjoy them.

BTW..................this is a kind of disease which has hit my entire class lately..............i am not very sure if eveyone would agree to it.........but its surely worth thinkin over........and laughin

• Whenever a exams approaches sleep has to take control of all ur thinkin, workin, eating, drinking and eveything................the more tht ur behind ur schedule the more sleepy u get.......!!!! LoL
• If u dont come under the first category then.....................ur a loser !!!! LoL !!!!
• 2 days before the exam u realise tht u dont hv enough xeroxes of the subject and there is a mad rush to xerox .....everything...!!!!!!! the race is sooo intense tht half of ur cell balance is wasted in callin up people and ordering for more xeroxes or askin them if they already have them!!!!!
• The fight to xerox is sooooo intense tht...........inevitably fights will take place over very trivial matters [ this is mostly seen in girls..................god nos where the guys r !!!! ]
• Such fights r gr8 attention grabbers [ for those who r hungry for attn and r currently gettin ignored] and pure form of entertainment for the others [ here, others include .......the xeroxwalla, ppl like me and the strangers who r patiently waitin to xerox their stuff ] LOL..........!!!!
• Also the xeroxwalla is everones hero and the most sought after guy among everyone....heheheheh !!!!
• And finally in this mad rush for xeroxin............u never remember who has to pay whom for the xero, u always end up gettin an extra xerox or 1 less, ur money is goin down the drain coz u very well no tht ur never gonna read half the notes tht u hv xeroxed

AND HERE IS THE BEST PART...............................

in this entire melodrama of xeroxin, the only guy around would be the xeroxwalla !!!!!!!!!.......................All the other guys frn ur class would be either sleepin peacefully in their beds OR playin T.T. OR hanging out together in a place which dosent have a xeroxwalla in 1 km radius.

and very smartly these guys would later simply go through the notes and xerox it for themselves......and since its been already used and gone through , the impt parts r already underlined....and VOILA, their job is done....LoL !!!!!

I think i am gonna do the same thing next year...............actually i hope i would not hv to hunt for notes at such a last moment.................but as they say, old habbits die hard................i no tht such a thing would never happen..................and the story would repeat itself...............!!!!! LOL

Wish me luck for my exams , plz !!!!!!!!! I relly need it !!!!!

Simply gorgeous!!!!!!

Mumbai woke up today to see an incredibaly gorgeous day. It was simply magical. And to top it all it was a simply perfect day. Nothin was goin wrong absolutely nothin. It was picture perfect. Literally.

Actually this was a magical day in its true sense. We couldnt wait to get out in the lawn of the coll and enjoy the cool breeze and the slight drizzle. Actually our plans to go to Juhu beach just went down the drain, but still no one complained. Everyone was singin all the silly romantic songs and also "Happy Birthday to U" for god-nos-how-many-times for my 2 classmates. And then there was the incident when i saw Rohan (to everyone's surprise) approve the songs played on the laptop ( which was righ besides him while he was seeing ppl's work), he then went on to make request for some songs and also try to sing along with it.LoL

Wish this day wouldnt come to an end. I have just realised tht i have been smiling silly the whole day and even now, as i type, i have a very silly smile spread across my face. And i am not alone............my entire class, the juniors and also some of the faculty members have experienced the same thing. And it feels good! Definately.

But on the contrary, i just wonder, how will this untimely rain affect the supply of mangoes this summer. Hope they r not affected. Cant stand the thought of any summer without aamras poli!!!!LOL.

Neways, will now enjoy whtever is left of this gorgeous day!! Heres wishin for more of such beautiful seasonal change and the disclosure of an even more gorgeous image of this city. Heres to Mumbai and the rain gods!!!

Did u ever feel.............this way

Did u ever feel intimated by the person u almost thought u knew so well because of their unexpected reaction to a very important issue ? Did u ever feel scared by tht person's view abt the matter??? Did u ever anticipitate such, very disturbing reactions from them?? Did u ever feel tht ur perception of the person is so wrong tht all this while u have imagined them to be someone diff.........................so many questions yt life goes on..

Life had been fun for a long time. It was too good to last for a long time, i should have realised.This is how it all started.

I thought tht i knew my friend so well. It has been sooooo many years tht i knew my friend. I always thought i knew how my friend would react to any situation. Alas, I was wrong and i realised i was sooo wrong.

Over some issue, I realised i was talkin to a complete stranger who i didnt even realise. Someone so diff from the person i knew tht i didnt recgnise this person. Nor did i want to . So diff tht i just wanted to run in the opposite direction as fast as possible. I was soo wrong in judging tht person. But wht i missed was tht here i was happily judgin the person.......aaaaahhaa.............big mistake!!!!

No one likes to be judged!! I definately dont. Then why should i judge anyone else...........not my right!! But its true tht we have a perception of anybody and everybody tht we meet. A picture is played in our mind abt the person everytime we address this particular person. Isnt tht judgin?? I dont no. Maybe my perception abt this person had become so strong over the years tht a sudden change in it was not accepted by me. I just could not digest it. And it has for god-only-knows-wht-reason become such an issue for me alone tht i had to get it out.

Maybe i am now ready for a change in the perception or shall we say makeover of tht person's image in my head. None of my friend's reaction would hit me so hard now. I am so sure. But i am not sure i like it. Actually i hate it. I like the earlier image better. Because tht was how i imagined my friend would be.

My old friend.

Power equations............a generation awakens

Ever wondered why people wid power often misuse it and use it for their own convinience???. This tendency is widely evidenet in every field, its everywhere , spreadin like a disease. A 3 year old has definately bein affected by it......so how can we be left behind. We have all come to a point where sometimes we r so immune to this fact tht we seldom realise it. So reacting to it is never an opinion. Its only when we start suffocating tht we realise tht something has to be done......................

For once, i can safely say tht times may be changin. A few days ago i came across a news coverage of a political party floated by the IITans.................paritrana.........tut tut......things are changin. It was a very intrestin and refreshin piece of news as the party members ( actually they were IIT grads who had also done their post-grads frm abroad......and i wass to stunned to even remembr which univercitys...) were highly educated and very sensible ppl.............( the words higly educated are very alien to Indian politics....but how their education would help them without practical knowledge is a diff issue )..........

I thought it was a slightly "yuva" inspired move or it may even not be ( i am sure the thought of floatin a political party was not born over-night but must have been firmly rooted in their mind for years ).............but considerin the fact tht movies like "Yuva", " Rang De Basanti" are made which tackles the issue of a new and wiser generation waking up from its slumber is a sure indiaction of the preferences of the youth. These movies are suppose to be typical masala bollywood movies....... tailor made to make profit...........yet they r appretiated by the 'urban thinkin population' and the rest of the movie watchin population.........this is a clear indication of the fact tht things would change..............the power equations are shiftin............newer and better times wait ahead for us and the future generations.......alas, our wait has come to an end!!!!!!!

Happy Valentine's Day

Happy Valntine's Day

yeah i do like this day...........the streets r filled with very amusin ppl or rather coupls and even more colourful ballons, flowers and all tht mushy stuff in violent pinks and purples.....luv to see it........

I had a gr8 day today with my class but on the flip side....i lost my good friend to her boyfriend.........guess its all ok..........its only 1 day......but i have always spent this spcial day with her.............

nwys girl, its ok if u have ditched me (jus kiddin and i no tht u would read this).............but in any case.............

....................................HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U................................................

and yes......i wanna hear all the details abt today...in detail !!!!!! .........hhehhehe!!!!!!!

....................

i cant think of tile for this post............so feel free to suggest one for this..................

neways..............today i had deciced to bunk coll and say at home and WORK. And i had even seriously started workin.......i was makin good progress.........and then my mom tells me tht ur classmate just called.............and u have to attend coll or else u wont be able to give the jury on thursday.....................PHULEEZZZZzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wht rubbish!!!! does our princi think we r babies and he can make us think and work accordin to his leisure and pleasure.................or is it the fact tht power makes man do real crazy stuff [ this logic applies to all involved in this situation.........read as the chose ones ] ..............it was the most stupid thing to have happened.......................and why me............the day i choose to bunk....all this melodrama takes place..............

it always happens to me...........when i bunk, faculty gets pissed and i have to write a sick test paper twice or i wont be allowed in class.............i bunk and the faculty gets pissed and i am made to come to class to do work which is even not of this year....................

it is a very serious problem ..........for us and everyone in general...........there r reasons we bunk...and instead of firing and penalising the students for bunkin, the faculty should try and understand the reasons behind bunkin.............we bunk coz somethin suck....and wht sucks is wht has to be dealt with.............callin all the students and threatening them is definaely not the solution................

our coll claims tht they r very liberal with the students???........r they relly????..


they claim tht faculty members can be addressed by their first names..........how cool....how liberal...........butt r they relly????

they may be liberal in whtever context they choose...............but i feel cheated coz my basic democratic right of chosin is mercilessly snatched frm me...............and i was under the impression tht this is a democratic country.........seriously PAUL..............grow up.........learn to call spade a spade......accept the fact tht 5th year WD sucks today [ as in 4th yr] ..... it relly sucks..............no point pretendin................WAKE UP before its too late..........the CAA tried to arouse u frm ur slumber............. but if u choose to ignore it again............then there may be a huge problem ahead......................i feel it...........wake up man..........

Exam Time...................

Today, at around 11am, i was sitttin in the conference room at my coll. Waitin for my jury to happen . A bit nervous, a bit haressed. I was getin impatient o start with my jury and finish it well. However, the profs were in no mood to hurry. The 2 profs were busy discussing how the builders make more money and how we or architects dont get a share of it [ i agree with it ;P ] and where does the CEO of this very renowned company sit and how his older brother has still not vacated the office even after the split and all tht blah..............when suddenly out-of-the-blue-moon, my friend sitting next to me glanced down at her watch. She smiled, looked up and whispred to me tht ..................."u no wht, my bro's biology pracs must have started by now.......he is givin his HSC ..........." the smile was still intact.............but the smile itself had a very diff story to tell....

I suddenly realised tht i was smiling too..........for some vague reasons i knew why we both were smiling at each other.............tht smile had a diff story to tell..........a story which i am sure all of us have experienced as the first person............the story of any freakin board exam.....

It transported me back to a very unceratin period in my life...or for the matter any students life...........the board exams r loomin close by, the pressure is mountin, the test series have to be completed, more and more notes, chapters, books, etc have tto be scaned and stored in the brains.......ur appetite suffers, u suffer, u either can sleep at night or u r extremely sleepy through ou the day and night, hence, u suffer again......and the day finally dawns...............its a nightmare.....completely........

The 11am heat outside made me remember all this and suddenly i had goosebumps.....the smell in the air suddenly told me tht years ago i was also writin a similar exam, same time in some place.............the heat outside very cruelly reminded me tht i still have to finish revising my derivation and intgration formulae [ another nightmare]..............the sudden pang in my stomach reminded me tht THIS IS IT............I have been studying for this day for years, i have to give my 100%.......................i still can feel the butterflies creatin a havoc in my stomach.

But today was a diff day..............its all over for me [ atleast for now].........i am through it...............i have SUCCESSFULLY managed to overcome this hurdle and move ahead in life............its a bright, new day for me..........

I smiled to myself.........a smile which was reassuring and even more comfortin..........suddenly i didntt feel nevervous anymore.................instead i had made u my mind tht..................today is a gr8 day!!!!!!!

PRELUDE..................

Prelude.......???!!! wht a weird title one wuld say.........but tht was how i have saved it on my d-drive..............because tht was the first word tht came to my mind as soon as i read it!!!

I am talkin abt this mail tht i had recievd a couple of days ago. It kind of is a compilation of my thoughts.........thoughts of a "TWENTY - SOMETHING "

I relly liked the title.....coz it did touch a very sensitive nerve..........TWENTY - SOMETHING bin twenty implies so many thngs...........and so many SCARY things which are said and also unsaid...........things which sometimes we feel are not meant for us but for someone older to us.............but suddenly those jobs r given to us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah.............being twenty has its bnefits and down-sides.........but its an amazing experience nonetheless.

This brings we back to the mail....................it has within it many paras.............which i am sure everyone i.e. every TWENTY - SOMETHING would relates to................so here are the paras.....1 at a time.............literally copy pased frm the mail.....along with my own interpretations..........

They call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."It is when you stop going along

with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about

yourself that you didn't know.

yeah......thts wht i am talking abt..............we surprise owerselves by sayin smething which we earlier would never had dared to say!!!!!!!!!!!! we take up responsiblities.........we vote........we drive [ officially] ;) ...............we hence officially become adults...............happy realistaion to us all!!!!!!!

You start feeling insecure and wonder

where you will bein a year or two,

but then get scared because

you barely know where you are now.

itsnt this clearly evident!!!!!!!!!!!!..................these signs and emotions r everywhere.....outside every colleges and institutions also within the walls of our homes or.......plastered on the faces of the millions like us that we would see running to catch a train or bus.......even on the beach...... in malls......... JUST ABT EVERYWHERE!!!!!!!!.........uncertain future, uncertain relationships, peer pressure, self-discovery, proving urself.................

One minute, you are insecure and then the next,secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.

You feel alone and scared and confused.

Suddenly,change is the enemy and you try and cling on to

the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is

drifting further and further away, and there is nothing

to do but stay where you are or move forward.

no one can run away from this.....................absolutely no one............so less time left......so many emotions felt............hormones acting up........r should i say hormones settling down????.............and also no point denying this..............

i kept reading this mail over and over again.............for the first time i thought a very useful forward has finally come through.............it just explains so many things..................butt this is just a small part of the mail..............i may write abt the rest of it later................coz i am still unsure..............and now i better publish his mail before i decideto delete it...............so... here is a [confused] TWENTY -SOMETHING signing off..............

End of the road.........or a start of a new begining

I generally dont feel so insecure abt nething...........but today is a diff story altogether. I was , untill a few minutes ago, strugglin to write a synopsis for my thesis presentation tht would happen tomm.......THESIS???....TOMM???..........but i am only in 4th yr!!!!!!............i still have to finish this year and then worry abt thesis in 5th yr..............but not anymore.........

Its relly scary when i and my batchmates start talkin abt thesis.........the project is in a too early stage to make me nervous but the thought tht i would be levain my insitution behind and steppin out..........tht is scary........the thought implies just soo many things which have suddenly become unspeakable for me........

Does it mean tht it is an end of a very carefree and funfilled times?? and the fact that such carefree times will possibly never come , in this form, again i our lives????

Or do i assume tht we have much better things waiting for us outside and those would eventually compensate our nostalgia????

It only seems like yesterday tht i had entered the insitution and had come to terms with so many things tht i was unaware abt.........so many diff value systems and ideas........struggling to fit in.........yet remain diff...........yes.....it only seems like yesterday........sometimes i wish tht when i would wake up tomm, i would still be in 1st yr and the memories of the past years would be wiped clean to accomodate new ones.........i still wish.... if only i was possible........[sigh]

Just typing out my thesis synopsis has started affecting me..............maybe i am preparing myself for the days to come............days filled with more responsiblities, work and wht not......

So, in the meantime..........let me make a small promise to myself..........henceforth, let me live my life to its fullest extent...........love each and every moment tht comes my way............njoy and learn whatever i can................JUST LET ME LIVE MY LIFE!!!!!!!! Tht's it!!!!!!

Resolutions.....................

I....................

Will not ignore this blog for a long time................
Will not ignore in general..................
Will try and stay away frm the colour orange for a while.............
[ god knows why ppl have problem with tht colour.......such a bright and happy colour]
Will try to igore the ppl who should be ignored.............
[ actually ignore them even more]


As i read this post , i have just realised how negative this post has become .............but had not intended it to be tht way.......i have made this resolutions so tht my life becomes easier and better and have just ended up with an irony.........some things in life r just beyond logic........atleast for me!!!!!!!!

Happy New Year.................a gr8 week for a start!!!!!

Such a gr8 new year celebration. And a very refreshin way to start a new year. No year long resolutions for me this year [ acually thts 1 of my resoluion]. Instead will aim for smaller and more attainable resolution'S.......................it worked for me........saw the result of it in 1 week flat.....finally found a way of keepin my own word for myself....................

Unfortunately coll started on 2nd and had to attened as we had workshops................but it was a very amusing and xcitin week............a week overloaded with work..........but the fun was also unlimited.

.......exchange students........talent night.......night maroing in the coll and at friends place..................the presentation..............the SPICE Girls.................Koreans [ they were soooooo cute.....especially the twin towers ]......................the DRESS rehersals and the drama tht went with it............the actual dance.........solo performance in a group dance...............the most-xcited-abt-but-not-perform-mujrah..............the videos of the performances..........the review of some missed performances................Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wht fun!!!!!!!!!!!!

Neways..................heres wishin Happy and Prosperous New Year to eveyone.......i no its very late but better late than never..............

Decmbr rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Its been a long time since i posted stuff............actually more than a month!!!!!!

December has been such an eventful month...........renovation of the house and the pains associaed with it!!!!!............. practically no work in coll [ actually there is a lot to do but dont know where to start!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ].................postponing of submission but giving it neways..........the very badly done model and the efforts or rather the wasted efforts and fun behind it............kalyug the movie, simii roy, rahul, comments,the tiffin ka dhakkan...............then comes the famous and controversial site visit to madh island.........beautiful homes in the hands of the most unhygenic, despo and filthy rich ppl.............the ride to kanheri caves, fighting over who will drive rasika's car, rasika's car itself!!!!!!!!! , the car's 1st gear, fogetting keys in the car and locking the door, playing in the playground till we all got sun-burned!!!!!!!!!
and then the next site visit to wockhart............the damn services of the bldg, loosing my WALLET!!!!!![ how could i !!!!........but thts a diff post altogether!!!!! ].......................the trek to MAHULI which i completed [ i will devote a new post for it]................my first trek..........and icing of the cake.........................I GOT BACK MY LOST WALLET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thts again a new post.....................................

its a real good finish to a year which was in some way not so good and sometimes bearable...............if things go this way..........my life rocks.!!!!!!!!!!!!.................surely

Believing is wht i can do.....only momentarily

I never believed in fate or destiny or God, but today I want to.

I never believed in any event if my "logical" brain couldnt reason it out, but today my" logical" brain forces me to believe.........but i still dont want to......yet i have to and i will, i know tht for sure.

I never wanted to deal with my distant future, whats the point neways....wht has to happen will happen, i rather live and deal with my present................but still i cant ignore my distant future on the basis of my past and present.

I never believed in fate but i firmly believed in coincidences............

Its funny to see tht how a human manipulates his vocabulary to decide wht he wants to believe and wht he dosent...........everyone does it....and if u claim u dont...............then ur not a thinking human being..................
This is exactly wht we all do........me included.

I have just realised that i knowingly or unknowingly share this weird and messed up equation with my brain and conscience. I have always denied fate and destiny. i saw no reason to believe it. It never fitted in my thinking.

Today, this eqaution is altered. I cannot ignore facts. Facts, so true and so unimaginably intertwined tht I can no longer deny it. My brain accepts it without doubt, but my conscience still has two-minds abt it.

I am too confused , no doubt abt tht. But confusion helps sometimes. It is helping me .............now.......to sort out my reasons for believing and not believing.

I never believed in fate or destiny, but today, i want to believe it.

And i mean each of the word i have written.

Of GOD, i still dont know..........maybe the realisation of HIM being there would come to me someday.......till then i would believe in a powerful force.........my conscience.....which is my GOD!

Missed B'day wishes...............

The phone suddenly rings...................picked by the one who is nearest to it...............and yippe............its for me!!!!!!!!!!! Finally someone is calling me...............

The reciever is yet to be handed to me and i am informed tht Akshata is online...........here is my reaction as i almost run and trip over the bed to snatch the reciever..............

Akshata???....did he say akshata???...wow......i was wondering how many days more do i have to try and call her in Manglore and listen to tht stupid message of the no. being disconnected.........

Disconnected???!!!!!.............wht the hell!!!!!how can she disconnect the number and not inform me...........IS IT RELLY AKSHATA online?????...wow....wht luck!!!!!!


Hope she is well!!!!!.....but i am suppose to be angry with her...............yes i keep forgettin...........how could she do this to me!!!!! Of all her friends she chose me!!!!! WHY!!!??????..............neways..............atleast she has called now.

Thnk god she has called............i thought she was unwell or dead [ jokingly ]............or has she eloped.....i hope not!!!!!!.............but she cant do this to me!!!!!!!! ..........

its relly funny but all of the above mentioned thoughts were played in my head in the same order............wow!!!!!we girls can think and feel so much in so less time...................actually to be precise the diistace between me and the phone took me only 5 sec. max to cover...........so i hope the speed of thought and the change in the topic is completely noticed and appericiated here!!!! LOL

After the ususal how r u???..... and all tht crap, begins the real fun!!!!! here it is............a very heavily edited and sensored version of our conversation...................

Manasi: [ angrily.......atleast forcefully tryin to bring it in the voice ] Sal@@, i have been trying ur no. for the past week at all possible hour of the day,even ur mom was trying ur cell............tht stuppid dabba of urs is meant to be kept on so tht we can reach u whenever we want and PLZ dont switch it of..................yap yap...... blah blah blah..............

Akshata:......yap..yap..yap....blah...blah..... arre range nahi thee na.......had gone to this place place na [ for some vague reason, actually she had told me the reason...........but whtever.... :P ] isliye range nahi thee aur phir................yap....yap....blah....blah...............................

Manasi:[ kaisi ban rahi hai jaise ki kuch galti hi nahi hui hai...........actually i should be even more angry with her.......wht attitude] ya, ya, whtever.................Akshata u know wht.............i am damn angry angry with u coz u didnt call me on my b'day.....................why did u do such a horrid thing..........and tht too on my 21 st b'day............

Akshata:[ wht the hell!!!!!! ].............aare par maine...........but.....no........aaree...........

Manasi:[ seriously man.........i am very hurt and dissapointed..but why is tht angry tone of mine subsiding.....shit must do somethnig abt it.......i HAVE to be angry ] u know wht everone called............all of my friends, even some of long out-of-contact junior coll frnds also called................schoolfrnds...........chat frnds.............everone called............and not u!!!!!!why did u do this akshata????..............i was so angry and lets not forget i still am.........

Akshata:[ why is she yappin.........and wht the hell is she talkin?????...........wht rubbish is this???......some kind of a joke kya????..chup kar aur meri bat sun... ].....aareeeeeee...........but i had called u!!!!!!!!!!!

Manasi:[ seriously wht rubbish is this!!!!!] wht rubbish................no!!!!!!! u hadnt!!!!!...........

Akshata:[ will she shut up and listen???!!!!! ] aare baba ha.......i had called u....actually i had set the alarm for midnight so tht i can call u...........and i remember tht i had....i had wished u a happy b'day and u had said thank u but u jus hung up on me...........

Manasi: [ she has the guts to come up with some shit story..........i dont believe her!!!.....or should i?? but had she called me?!?!?!....no re she hadnt..........otherwise would have spoken with her for an hour.............i am now 100% sure tht she hadnt called......but such an incredible story.......am sure she must have spent half a day makin it up!!!! ]..noooooooooooooo..................u had not called at 12 o clock.................only 3 ppl had called..................of which i didnt recieve the second call...............and the remaining ppl were singing for me and then we chatted.......must have spoken o them for like 15mins each...................so bottomline..................u didnt call!!!!!!

Akshata:..........but i had................


we both later on concluded tht akshata had actually called on my b'day...............but......but........she hadnt called me............she had dialed someone else's no. and had wished tht person..............and imagine the person had accepted the wishes.............how ridiculous!!!!!! :D :P

i was still laughin abt this whole incident.............. she is the only person who can pull of such a stunt.................god!!!!!! wishin someone else on someone else's b'day.....................and the most amazin thing is tht she is entertained by a very sportin person at the other end of the line.................hehehheheh

some words of advice for u................never attempt to call me or neone else OR sign a document OR commit OR give away nething if ur in a deep slumber...............the consequences can range frm being hilarious [ like this one ] to disasterous................also never accept a lift frm a person who claims to know how to ride a kinetic but actually is not accoustumed to it..........another big disaster...........i hope u agree......................

i hope u read this...............i would love to read ur comment...but leave "nice" comments only :D :P.........let the unpleasant ones be reserved for our next telephonic conversation..............so long girl!!!!!!!

Asha Bhosle..a Living Legend

On 11th November frm 8am till 11:30am, i spent a good 3.5hrs completely mesmerized by "INDIAN MADDONA IN TENNIS SHOES" tht is........ Asha Bhosle!!!!!!!!!! It was a experience which i cannot express in words. Her interview had aired on the radio and tht day i made sure i was up at 8 am waiting for the legend to come on air.......live.I relly thank RADIO CITY 91 FM......for doing this when i was at home or else i would have missed it.

This beautiful and soulful voice, has helped me finish my most borin submission, helped me go through a bad experinece of chicken pox, has helped me stay awake nights together, has made me laugh, cry, dance and also get nostalgic. I do not remember when had i first heard her voice. But whenever it was , her voice and the emotions in it, have definately grown on me. God, i luv all of her songs.....right frm classics, old film songs, ghazals, marathi songs, classical based ones........and not to forget her very famous cabret [ read it as a combi of asha bhosle and helen........wht a pair!!!! one is a dancing queen and the other signing queen ] .Truly a verastile and a very down-to-earth singer. Team up Asha with Rehman and its a feast for all the music lovers.

There was a very cute question asked by Archana [ RJ who was hostin the show ] .She had just asked Asha Bhosle abt her relation with Helen and the songs she sang for her. And then came the question........

" Ashaji, aapne helenji ke liye itne gane gaye, jin main dance ya cabret hote the.........toh main yeh pochna chahungi ki kya aap bhi dance karti hai ????!!!!!!!!!!! "

The answer was the very cute and very innocent dimpled laugh ...which is Asha Bhosle's trademark....and she politely declined..................But i would say this is not true..............a person would have to be a very gifted dancer if such songs have to be sung...its just not clear to me how come she say tht she does not dance!!!!!!!!!............i, myself do believe tht she is a excellent dancer...................... try and imgaine a person singin "piya tu ab toh aaja" and " dum maro dam " and all those songs without groovin to the beats or the melody....... impossible i say........ :D:D

If there was nething i would ask for then it would be this and only sing...............let me sing !!!!!!

God, i wish i could sing!!!!!!!!!........not like her but atleast a little......... i have come to conclude tht singing is truly a gift u have to be born with...........consider urself extremely lucky and blessed if u have been gifted with the abilty to sing......
i have always wondered how good it would feel to think of musical notes in ones mind and heart and also sing those notes loudly [ exactly the way u have intended them to be ] l
............for urself and others.............
if anyone of u can explain this feeling to me plz do!!!!!! i have never been able to feel it.

Long ques, real bad luck but good entertainment

Its relly very amusing tht when u have to stand in long que for any work, the que u are standing in is the slowest one to move. Or ur que would be filled with such idiots tht they would try to give half- filled or completely incorrect forms to the person sittin on the other side.
Or there would be a huge argument / discussion abt some smartass who has tried / already has broken into the line.The bottttom line is however tht, u have always ended up standing in such doomed / jinxed ques.

Today, I had the honour of standing in such a boring and non- movable line. Actually it was not such a bad experience standing in the line [ actually it was never a line, more of a zig-zag shaped human formation ] . But the sad part was tht, even though i spent 3-4 mins trying to calculate which line would move a little faster, i eventually ended up in the line which was practically not movin for the next 10 mins.

People came and went past me.........but there i was standing exactly in the same place where i was for the last 10mins. But then , those 2 characters ahead of me made me laugh and smile [ the smiling and laughin was done in my head and not loudly.....would have looked like a idiot otherwise ].

Firstly, i couldnt understand their language.......so it was even more fun to try to estimate wht topic were they chattin on.............secondly, i was able to catch some of the words said by them.......here they are..............and let me warn u........these words are completely irrelevant ......and it seems tht r not connected..........actually i can come up with some relly weird stories [ read Bollywood / Mollywood potboilers] if these words are forcibly joined together....makes a heartly laugh though....the words then...

• Chandigarh
• Ministerji aaye the na
• biwi ke bhabhi ka pehechanwala
• rasteke andar kachra..........waaater shoor tage hai naaaa
• busy life.........50,000 ka ooooooffer aaya tha

Actually so many of these words.....cant even remember the reaminin............those 2 were braggin so much at the end abt some contract and money involved and how they refused it............GOD!!!!!!!........i was burstin with laughter.......it was very sitautional and hence very funny to a very frustrated mind.....................but i have to given them their due credit tht it was because of them tht i had a good time and the sorrow / anger / dissapointment of seing people moving past me was almost forgotten.

Free main good entertainment. Enjoyed it a lot. Its good to meet such characters once in a while.